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Mental lists

Things are plugging along here. I finished quilting the Osprey wing. I just need to trim it down and finish the binding/edge treatment. I’ve decided that finishing this quilt is something that could wait for the last minute, so I’ve begun a new piece.

This new quilt is going to be a companion piece to a one I made a couple years ago. Similar idea and color palette, something more whimsical than I have been working; a giant tulip! It should be fun to work on.

As I’m building my collection, my mind is definitely processing what comes next. As I posted last week, I’ve been accepted for a solo show at Page-Walker Arts & History Center in Cary, September 2018. I know this gallery well, so my mind is thinking what sort of artwork groupings I should have. What is great about having 2 years to work on this, is that I could create pieces specifically for the walls of this gallery space. So many possibilities.

I’m also thinking about what comes next. I can’t allow 2018 to be the only exhibit opportunity in my future. I have so many ideas and I’m looking forward to pursuing them. Just 7 more weeks and “Paper, Canvas, Cloth” will be hanging at the Campbell House in Southern Pines. Once that is up, I’ll start focusing on all my mental lists.

Join me for:

“Paper, Canvas, Cloth”
November 4 – December 17, 2016
Campbell House Galleries, Southern Pines, NC
featuring the work of
Sharon Ferguson, Marilyn Vendemia, & Nanette S. Zeller

Self-doubt

Being an artist can be a very isolating. I spend a lot of time alone in my studio, especially now, as I prepare for my November exhibit. I’m down to crunch time and all I’m thinking about is getting things done. I feel like I’m running out of time. I need to be in the studio more. And I wonder, how will I accomplish all of this? I take comfort that it’s all going to be OK. So I breathe. I know I’m not alone, many artists face the same angst. It’s par for the course.

As an emerging artist, there’s also this underlying insecurity. What will people think? I think my work looks OK, but I’m very biased. It’s like saying your baby is the cutest. And “everybody” thinks their baby is the cutest.

I’ve realized, I’m in a different place right now. My ideas are coming from deep in my soul. It’s a life-long journey coming together and expressing itself in fabric. My art has purpose to me…I’m no longer making it just because. I have stories behind each piece. I’m moving forward. The isolation is there and the angst, but I do my best to ignore it. I’m not going to let the negative speak defeat me.

A few months ago, I made a decision to let go of something that I was deeply invested in. As I walked away from that activity, I was reminded of a call-for-entry deadline that was fast approaching. A friend of mine frequently reminds me that we never get accepted if we don’t apply. So, I pulled my stuff together and, with a kiss on the cheek, I sent in the application. Of course, I hoped for the best, but would be OK with any decision they made.

Today, I received a phone call from out of the blue. An affirmation. They are impressed with my work. I’ve been offered a solo show in a public art gallery. I had a choice of 2 dates, so I picked one. I’m going big, so I’ll need the time. September 2018. As one door closes, another opens.

Having an affirmation like this is a kick in the pants that says don’t give up. Keep trying. There’s no room for self-doubt.

Trust me, it’s big

I feel like I’m moving like molasses in January. I have been putting a lot of hours into the quilt hanging on my design wall, titled “Knock, Knock. Who’s There?” This quilt is huge, that’s half my battle. When I make a quilt I usually create the background fabric much larger than I need it. That’s why I can’t tell you how big it will be. I’m guessing somewhere around 40″ wide x 60″ tall.

The other aspect of what I’m doing … that takes time … is all the layering. I create one layer, work to get it right and then it’s time for the next layer. What I posted last week was 2 layers, I made the trees and added some shading. The shading was done with Shiva Paintsticks (which is oil paint in stick form). It takes a 24 hours for the paint to cure and become permanent.

This week, I added some tulle to create the waterline on the trees and some highlights to the swampy water. Today I securely stitched down the trees and tulle to my batting layer. This took a few hours. The birds are yet another layer to this quilt, because I had to stitch down the trees before I could add them. Last week I made the birds and today they are now glued forever to the quilt.

Progress? yes. Molasses in January? Most definitely.

I’m getting closer to the part I enjoy most, the machine quilting and thread painting. I have to add some more details to this monster (more layers) and then it will be ready for the long arm machine. Yay, it’s getting there! Just in baby steps. Once the quilting is finished I’ll be able to cut it down to size and let you know how big it really is. Right now trust me, it’s big.

Respite is over

Happy Wednesday! (or what ever day you happen to stop by)

It’s been a month since I’ve written, one very long month. There was a lot of things going on that I couldn’t control. It took everything I had to get through each day, some days were worse than others. But here I am, 30 days later, and the universe hasn’t destroyed me. I view myself as a fighter, a tough kid born and raised on the south-side of Chicago. Sometimes even the strong have to step back from life, focus on the moment, and gain energy so they can move forward again.

These last several weeks, I couldn’t move forward, so I just stepped back to regain my energy. So here I am today, ready to put on the boxing gloves and take back my life.

During my time away, I also took time to reflect on my future. What do I want? Where do I want to go? I realized in order to keep moving in the right direction, I had to let go of excess baggage. I resigned from a volunteer job that I thought I wanted to do and suddenly I see so many opportunities available to me. Lots! of opportunities, because I’m putting my personal and professional interests first. Something I haven’t done in several years. What a relief to make this decision! There is more weight that has to go, but I’m still working out those ideas. Always a journey for me, always new opportunities.

Ok now, where are my scissors? It’s time to dust off the sewing machine. I’m ready for this. The respite is over.

5 ft-wide Wingspan

The parakeets are coming along nicely. All the thread work and quilting was accomplished using my HandiQuilter Sweet16 sewing machine. I am so grateful for having been awarded the grant to purchase this machine. I really has made creating large quilts so much easier.

I’ve debated about posting a final picture of the parakeets here. I’ll probably do that eventually, but most likely closer to my November show at the Arts Council. I’m pretty proud of what I’ve done on this one. But, unfortunately, you’ll have to wait a little bit for the reveal.

As soon as the “keets” are done, I’ll be on to the next pieces. One was inspired by a photograph taken of an osprey by my friend, Brady. Brady is a phenomenal wildlife photographer. He provided the inspiration for my “Fireline” quilt I made a few years ago.

For “Fireline”, Brady had the photo and I rendered it in fabric. This time, I had the idea and asked Brady if he had a photo that would help me accomplish my idea. I’m so happy to be working with his imagery again…can you imagine a 5-foot wide wingspan?

Great Things

Now that I’ve released myself of a lot of responsibility, there’s silence, a lot of it. I can hear the computer humming.

Starting this week, my focus is on making my art career work. There’s plenty to consider, namely how do you make money? Make art and make money – is this an oxymoron?

I’ve met a lot of artists in my life. Most of us struggle with the financial side of the job. I know a couple who have succees. Many pick up side jobs; barista, sales clerk, etc. For a majority their art is the side job, juggling a full-time job and creating whenever time is available.

The mantra is you have to put in the time. There are a lot of things to consider, but my plan is to put in the time this summer. I guess the reason I volunteer so much is that it’s easier to do tasks which are clear and direct. It’s someone else’s vision, not mine. Sure, I have some clear ideas of what I need to do, but it can be overwhelming to think about specific tasks that need to get done. The ideas are clear but the path isn’t always very direct. I feel like those inflatable dancing advertisements, bending and swaying, moving up and down. It’s mesmerizing, but I need to look away and show up. Once I’m there, I stand still, refocus, then start. The magic will happen.

So, it’s time for me to get to work. I’m looking forward to showing you some great things.

My Next Big Journey

I frequently say I’m on a creative journey. I don’t know where I’ll wind up. I make plans. Frequently I find it doesn’t really matter, because plans change. There are speed bumps along the way which slow me down. I want to move faster, but sometimes I can’t. No matter how fast I run, the treadmill doesn’t seem to move me farther down the road. I try to enjoy the journey while I can. Eventually, I stop, look around and realize I have moved forward. I’ve grown. How did that happen?

Along my journey, I find things that look all shiny and new. I tell myself “I want that, but what is it?” I go investigate. Sometimes I dive in with my entire body and soul. Like a big old belly flop, I become engulfed. I’m invigorated. I found the place I was looking for. Lucky me!

Then, time moves forward. I start noticing I’m on the treadmill again. The shiny new thing begins to look kind of dull and grey. I’m bored. I’m tired. Or worse…I’m ready to jump off at 80 miles an hour.

On this journey, I always want to learn. I beg the universe to give me knowledge. Learning gives me energy. Using my knowledge makes me feel strong.

I’ve noticed that I eventually have to walk away. The grass isn’t as green as I thought it was. I look around and realize I’ve grown again. I can’t learn any more here…or maybe I don’t want to learn anymore. It’s time to find another lake to swim and the next green pasture to explore. Oh looky, what’s over there?…Ready, set, go….it’s time to go on my next big journey.

Exercise

I finally opened the box last week. The big box that contained my new sewing machine. It’s been a bit intimidating having this huge machine in my studio office. I set up the machine and gave it a test drive. I think I’m going to like it.

Things don’t feel right yet. My work space has changed due to this bohemoth living with here. The space I used to use for cutting has shrunk and also is the extension table for Bohemoth. It’s all awkward. Everything feels awkward, by system is out of balance.

I have another table in my room that use to be the cutting table. It became the catch all years ago. With a little effort (I’m almost there), I’ll be able to clean it off and use it again. How does one collect so much stuff? Clippings with ideas/inspiration and patterns for future use. Of course there’s fabric, yarn, paints, brushes, rubber stamps and beads. I really need to thin and re-organize.

I hesitate on culling, because I view most of what I have as part of my toolbox. I just know there’s going to be a day when I need that synthetic stretchy metallic-looking fabric. And, who knows when I will need a metal bee to adorn a quilted flower. Maybe I don’t need 200 hundred little bees, but you never know.

Either way, it’s time to get cleaning and sewing. I have some deadlines ahead and Bohemoth is nagging me give it some exercise.

Happy New Year

Every year at this time, I reflect on what I’ve accomplished and where I’m heading. The new year is a good time to do this type of inventory, because there’s a virtual line between old and new. Say goodbye to the old and hello to the new, so to speak. In reality time is just one continual blur, so any date could be used as a reflection point. Deliberately or not, I always tend to reflect more at this time of year.

Looking back, I really did a lot this past year. I produced 2 art exhibits, entered several shows, and applied for and received a grant. I spent a lot of time last year helping others on their journey. I’ve learned a lot.

This year, it’s time to work on me. It’s time to put the energy into my own artwork as I get ready for an exhibit in November 2016. I realize I’m easily distracted [dutifully noted, as I just spent 2 hours working on my website]. I find it easy to help other people, but find avoidance in my own productivity. This is going to change this coming year. I’ve been clearing my plate of many things so that I can find more studio time.

One thing that I’ve been doing the last couple months is search for creative inspiration. Every day, I try to look for and photograph things that inspire me. I tend to find the most beauty in the natural world. I enjoy seeing the color pallets that naturally occur around me. The form, structure, and design created in nature is pretty amazing too.

When I can’t be in the studio, these photographic essays are a way for me to entertain my creative sprite. They also inspire me with ideas for my art. I’m not sure how all the images fit, but having them in my “library” will prove to be a great resource when they’re needed.

It will be interesting to see how this next year advances. Right now, I don’t have many hard core plans yet, but that’s what January is form…thinking and dreaming about what I’ll make of 2016. As always, I’m looking forward to a new year and I hope you are too!

Happy New Year!

Use for the Leftovers

The other day I was watching an episode of Quilting Arts TV. The host, Susan Brubaker-Knapp was interviewing Mark Lipinski. For a couple years, I’ve heard of his “Slow Stitching Movement.” I don’t know much about this iconic quilter, but I suspected what he was talking about was hand sewing. Slowing down and enjoying the stitch.

Well, it turns out I was half-right. His concept isn’t about doing hand work, but it is about slowing down and experiencing the process. I’ve been a similar journey for many years, I know it as being mindful and present in the moment.

It took watching this program, to realize that I could, and should, be applying the same concepts to my sewing. One concept Mark addresses is taking inspiration from things around you. He says that each day he takes a photo that inspires him. In the land of cellphones and iPads, this is pretty easy to accomplish. I’m trying to do this. I’m not so faithful about doing it everyday.

Another thing, Mark says he does is sew mindfully for 30 minutes, twice, everyday. In his demo he was just sewing strips of fabric. As he was doing it, he was paying attention to the sound and motion of the machine. It put him in the present moment; mindful. Brilliant.

I’m still in my little rutt, but doing what I can to keep the creativity flowing through my veins. Last week I tried Mark’s sewing technique. For the past 6 years, I’ve been collecting the interesting cut-aways from my quilts. These cut-aways are the pieces that I remove when I square up the edges after finishing a quilt. Last week, I trimmed these pieces into strips of various widths and then randomly stitched them together to create colorful quilted panels. I have a couple ideas about how to use them.

These panels inspire me because they show a bit of my history. I know where each piece came from. Some of the original quilted fabric were deconstructed from artwork that didn’t quite make it the first time around. I think I’m going to do more of this. Instead of piecing fabric, I could do free motion stitching 30 minutes each day. That could be fun and now I’ve found a use for the leftovers.